Monday, June 27, 2011

Hit The Ground Running week #2: Loving Your Spouse

Happy Monday!

First, the winners from last week's giveaway are:
The "Know Your Bible" book: Amanda M.
The Starbucks Gift Card: Natalie

Congrats, girls!

I hope if you're reading this that you're already participating in my Summer Challenge, spending 15 minutes a day reading your Bible and praying. If not, you can still join in. Check out the Summer Challenge post HERE.

And now on to week #2 of my Hit The Ground Running Series!


LOVING YOUR SPOUSE {written by my friend Dennis Johnston}

One of the biggest joys of our lives is found in the relationship with our spouse. The ability to nurture this relationship will determine our ability to add value to other people.


If you asked me and my wife Nichole how our first year of marriage was, you would get two different answers. I was convinced it was nothing less than marital bliss. It was great! She seemed attentive to my needs and as a I result I felt affirmed. She was convinced it was anything but marital bliss. It was difficult! I seemed oblivious to her needs and as a result she felt frustrated.

This lead to heated discussions that included honest dialogue such as:

“When you _______ I feel ________.”

One area we have always revisited was our marriage vows. Our commitment seemed almost effortless at the time. Yet, we have had to be intentional daily in honoring our commitment to each other.

I have found I’m always drawn back to a specific passage in the Bible to help me. “For I have no one like him who will be genuinely concerned for your welfare. They all seek their own interests, not those of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 2:20-21 ESV

The whole idea of being “genuinely concerned” for her welfare has been a huge blessing in our marriage. The other side of this is not seeking my “own interest” but seeking hers instead.

Here are a few ways we continue to be “genuinely concerned” for the welfare of each other:

We pray together. Not the “help my wife desire to serve me breakfast in bed prayers.” After we have conversations about challenges (etc.), we simply ask each other “how can I pray for you?”

We memorize Scripture together. Chuck Swindoll wrote, “I know of no other single practice in the Christian life more rewarding, practically speaking, than memorizing Scripture….No other single exercise pays greater spiritual dividends! Your prayer life will be strengthened….Your attitudes and outlook will begin to change. Your mind will become alert and observant” (Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life [Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1994], p. 61).

We affirm each other publicly. Nichole has the ability to make me look better than I really am – she always speaks highly of me in front of others when I’m not present. Similarly, I get a tremendous amount of joy by doing the same.

We encourage each other daily. We encourage through words, hugs, cards, notes, email, texts, and even non-verbally when we simply hold hands without expressing words.
Here are a few examples of some text messages within the past week:
o How’s your day? I prayed you get refocused this afternoon. You do a terrific job! Thank you for who you are!
o Thank you for being excited for our date tonight! I enjoyed spending time with you and learning how you are helping other people. There are few people like you – I Love You!
o You seem VERY tired. Please rest! I love you and look forward to walking with you tonight!
o Hi dear – you looked amazing this morning. Very beautiful!

We still include honest dialogue such as:

“When you _______ I feel _______.”

When Nichole affirms me I feel incredibly important to her. She has truly been one of the biggest sources of joy in my life.

I encourage you to share a few ways you continue to be “genuinely concerned” for the welfare of each other. Excited to hear from you!

{Thanks, Dennis!}

And now...THIS WEEK'S GIVEAWAY!

I'm giving away one of my FAVORITE books, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.


TO ENTER: leave a comment with how you continue to be “genuinely concerned” for the welfare of your spouse. If you comment anonymously, remember to leave your name.

I hope your week is off to a GREAT start!

DON'T MISS my post about Instituting Date Night. There's a new GIVEAWAY, too!

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2 comments:

  1. Matt and I really need to work on what Dennis writes about in respect to each other and our marriage. Sheryl (oh I'm concerned with his health and all of the traveling).

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  2. A wise friend of mine suggested a book called "The Praying Wife" and I have been learning all the ways that our husbands need prayers. I always thought they needed support and appreciation the most but now I'm learning to be more concerned about his spiritual well being! - EJ

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